Ha! There are monsters in Canada

I knew it!
My Canadian "friend" Bradford who earlier this year claimed that there was no monster-business going on in Canada was wrong!

I just got a very trustworthy report from the Comox Valley area where apparently some very large Northern Boulder Beasts have been smelled and sighted.

They had taken up residence in a small valley not far from a village and the stench of sulfur emanating from the beasts was what finally drew the attention of a young man (Evan, 10) who was able to observe and report the facts to me.
According to him they were "really huge" and "really, really stinky".

As I mention in the Field Guide, the boulder beasts are notoriously dumb and when the intrepid young monstrologist got discovered he was able to confuse them by singing "I'm a little tea-pot short and stout", and doing the movements.
The beasts simply thought he was a tea-pot, and left him alone.

Evan commented that he thought they were "really, really, really not smart".

A Failure on the Beach

The Beach Krill sightings in Puerto Rico turned out to be false.
There were however some very large crabs that attacked this intrepid monstrologist as he was in hiding under a very elaborate cover of camouflage netting and sand.
I had settled in for a long stake-out when around midnight I started feeling little pinches around my ankles. I never want to use my flashlight too much so I waited a bit before turning it on, but then I got pinched really hard! As i directed my flashlight toward my throbbing ankle I got pinched just above the belt towards my back and I realized that my hiding spot had been completely overrun by aggressive crabs.

I think that there might have been something in my latest concoction of potpourri that attracted crabs. Maybe the Karl Lagerfeld Cologne is not repelling enough?

In the end I saw no evidence of Beach Krill activity. I am sad to say that a large hollow that was pointed out to my as probably created by a Krill was more likely the result of sand-castle constructions.

I left the island with many crab-pinch marks, mosquito-bites, a bad sunburn and no further information on the Beach Krill.

But, that is the life of a monstrologis. Not every shadow is a beast, but you should always check.

The Beach Krill

(Euphausia litoris)

Beach Krill Sighting

I have just returned from Puerto Rico after I was called there based on reports of Beach Krill activity.


I will discuss my adventures more in depths soon but my flight was very delayed and I am tired... and painfully tanned after many hours of beach stake-outs.

A Wonderful Review

I was certain of receiving many good reviews of my Field Guide, after all it is a unique piece of work...but, I have also grown accustomed to being questioned and even ridiculed, therefore it is exceptionally heartwarming when you recieve a review such as this one:
Do you like being frightened?

IMPORTANT CORRECTION & INFORMATION

Because of a confusion of dates and altered times for my upcoming lecture at Barnes & Noble on 7th Ave. in Park Slope I have been giving the wrong time:

It will take place on the 2nd of November at 10.00 am.

And a reminder:
My radio appearance on WFUV (90.7 in NYC-area) is being rebroadcasted tomorrow around 7.45am.
At some point after that it will be in their online archive and thus available worldwide.

A Busy Sunday

It was a beautiful Sunday here yesterday and I enjoyed meeting a vibrant crowd of budding monstrologists at the event i participated in at the Brooklyn Botanical Garden.
I was slightly perturbed at the organizers who had somehow gotten my title wrong... Yes I do write and illustrate, but that is only to convey my research to the world. My actual title is Senior Monstrologist. It is just typical of the academic world to slight me like that.
But I sold out my Field Guide !
And it was clear that the people who came to meet me, they at least understand what monstrology is about and what it takes to do the research.
I especially have high hopes for Julian and Sophie, keep up the studies and one day you will find and catalogue your own monsters!

On another note, Benny is now calling me all the time, the Couch Cruncher ate his remote and he is getting desperate. I might call him back eventually.

And a reminder: I will be holding my lecture at the Park Slope Barnes & Noble 10am on Nov. 1st.

Benny is Back!

Remember Benny, my "friend" from Queens (see previous posts). Remember how he turned on me and decided not to trust my science? or his own eyes...

Well, he called the other day and the Couch Cruncher is back in his undoubtedly filthy couch and he needs help. We'll see what happens, I still feel a bit hurt, but he does have all those episodes of Mythbusters on his DVR and I do really enjoy a Mythbusters-marathon.

This is a flattering drawing of Benny

Upcoming Events

Finally some academic recognition!

The NPR affiliated radio station WFUV (90.7FM in NY-region) that is run by the Fordham University will be discussing Monstrology with me on the 23rd of October. The details are not set in stone and I am not sure about when it will air. I will keep you posted here.

Also, the biological research facility Brooklyn Botanical Garden will be hosting an event on the afternoon of the 28th of October that I will participate in. There will be a brief lecture by me but I'm afraid many other distractions going on at the same time. (Fun for some, I'm sure)

Lastly, my lecture at my local Barnes & Noble has been moved. I will now do it at 10AM on the 1st of November.
Please make appropriate changes to your calendars.

A Lively Debate

I'm sorry for the big gap in my postings but there was much to do about getting ready for my lecture and then there were two aspiring monstrologists visiting from Sweden that I had to spend hours with. They were complete novices but showed some limited potential. Hopefully I will hear more from them as they start practicing their monstrological skills in northern Europe.

The Lecture itself went very well. The audience appeared eager for knowledge and the debate got quite lively as I accepted questions from the public. In the end there was a rather heated discussion about the potential size of Tadpole Monsters.

A young girl claimed that they could be much wider than I believe is possible.

I doubted the veracity of her report since she also said it was "much smarter than you!" meaning me...How would she know anything about that? Kids...

A Lecture on monstrology

Here's the invitation for my upcoming lecture.